It’s Back To School Time and you know what that means… Tons of tears, globs of used tissues tightly clenched in palms and lots and lots of legs dragging unwilling bodies from their cars. Yes, the wailing and gnashing of teeth can be heard across the globe as this universal scene plays out every year. You know what I’m talking about: parents sending their precious babies off to college.
Which brings me to this question…are you “that mom” who is already weepy thinking about the day your world will come crashing down when your toddler moves into his dorm room? Or are you a NORMAL person??? As the mother of four amazing, gifted, sensitive, brilliant, tall, and attractive offspring, all of whom had the audacity to continue their schooling in institutions of higher education, I say…OMG GET OVER IT PEOPLE!!!! This is a NORMAL part of life; a rite of passage which calls for dancing in the streets, not sappy stories about how you cried for five straight hours in the car on the way home. It means you did your job and now you can have a little bit of a life.
In case you’re not sure where I stand on this topic (or even if you might have an inkling), check out my short podcast episode. Seriously, it’s only, like, 15 minutes long or something. You can do it. I believe in you. Just click on the link below or click on the Podcast App on your smart phone, type in “Where Are My Glasses” in the search bar and BOOM! You’re there. Oh and don’t forget to subscribe. I will love you forever. And, no that’s not a weird thing to say.
PS: Confession: my kids are pretty cool, but I might have exaggerated a little – they’re not all tall…
Well, it’s official. Summer bliss has ended. Well, at least the fantasy of summer bliss, which is probably the reason I’m extra depressed. Summer is over and there is NO question that we got a bum deal this year. The months of June and July were cold and rainy almost every day. Then came the oppressive heat. And suddenly, today is the first day of school for kids around here. SCHOOL PEOPLE!!! All we have left now to look forward to and keep spirits up is maybe two weeks of beautiful fall. That is, maybe fourteen days of crisp air, blue skies, and the intoxicating aroma of burning leaves all warmly engulfed in glorious autumn colors. But not fourteen consecutive days. Let’s not get crazy here. I might even be overly generous with that number. The fall offers a wonderful reprieve from the blistering heat and ungodly humidity of summer. But it is fleeting. I’ve learned to live in the moment on those magnificent days because those of us in the Midwest know what lies ahead… Cold darkness lasting about nine months. Yeah, that’s right. I’m not a winter person. I hate winter. I hate being cold. I hate driving in snow. I hate worrying about my kids driving in snowstorms. I hate shoveling snow. I know all you out-doorsy types are probably scoffing at me as you read this. You know who you are. All you snow-mobilers, cross-country skiers, and tobogganors. All you people who go on and on about how beautiful the snow is. Okay, I’ll concede that. After a storm, the pristine snow that blankets the ground and trees is gorgeous. But, that’s only if it happens on a weekend when we don’t have to actually be somewhere. When we don’t have to get the shovels out. And, let’s be honest. It’s only beautiful until the first car drives on the street. Then it quickly turns into dirty, slushy ick. Last March (yes…MARCH – when we dare to entertain thoughts of spring) my daughter tweeted: “If anyone throws a snowball at me, I will murder them” That’s right, the shine of winter had definitely worn off by March. Continue reading