Tag Archives: money

If I Were A Rich Gal…DoBeDoBeDoBeDo…

Mom_and_Money

Man Who Bought Lottery Tickets to Break $100 Bill Wins $10M

A Massachusetts man who bought a pair of lottery tickets at a grocery shop to break a $100 bill for lunch has ended up winning $10 million.

Lottery officials announced Thursday that Richard Noll and his wife claimed the prize at lottery headquarters in Braintree this week. He chose a one-time payment of $6.5 million after taxes.

The Revere man says he needed to break a $100 bill to get lunch at a sandwich shop, so he bought two $20 “Platinum Millions” instant tickets at Lanzilli Groceria in East Boston. The shop gets a $50,000 bonus for selling the winning ticket.

Noll says he wants to buy a house, make investments and take his granddaughter to Walt DisneyWorld.

 

Are. You. KIDDING ME???????

My first thought about this story is that, hey this guy already had more money than me to begin with…he was breaking a hundred dollar bill. Actually, that’s not true. My first thought can’t be printed because:

A. I don’t swear (well, not out loud, anyway)

B. You thought I was going to say “2” didn’t you? That’s kind of an old joke people…

C. I’m depressed

I have often thought about how much money I would have to win to be completely free of all debt and the answer isn’t pretty. I figure, in order to pay off our mortgage, credit cards, stores, cars, parent PLUS student loans, our four kids’ student loans and a couple of charities dear to me, I’d need a cool million. Easy. Truthfully, a little over a million would help get our youngest through her last two years of college. Well, a little more would be nice to cover her graduate studies… And, I wouldn’t scoff at another half mil on top of that… ya’ know…just to have a little something to stash away.

So, there you have it. A take-home winning of $1.6 million would do quite nicely. Although, I always thought I’d want to share my good fortune with family and a couple of friends, so let’s just make it an even $3 million. Hey, man, I’m not being greedy –  my husband and I come from big families.

I thought slipping two instant lottery game tickets into everyone’s Christmas stocking this year would surely net someone good luck, but it turned out I was the luckiest one of the bunch, winning a whopping three dollars. After reading this story however, I’m feeling lucky. I think a trip to the store is in order to see if I can make that win turn into something much bigger. Wish me luck. You might be one of the beneficiaries of my good nature…

 

 
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It Seems All My Wildest Dreams Will Come True…

Mom_and_MoneyYou know, I’ve never considered myself  to be a lucky person. I’m not one of those people who always seems to win things. We all know someone like that and I’m sorry to say that I’ve never been “that guy.” But, it seems my luck has taken a well-deserved u-turn. I recently received an email from AGENT JOHN EDWARD (the caps seemed to be a really important part of his name) informing me of a windfall that fate has blown my way. In a post I published on 5/13/2013, Money Can’t Buy Me Love…But I’m OK With That, I related the exciting news from AGENT JOHN EDWARD who had received notice from the WHITE HOUSE with instructions from Homeland Security (apparently not cap-worthy) for release of $10,000,000,000 (TEN MILLION DOLLARS) to little ol’ me. It was imperative that I  contact him immediately, as it was URGENT. All I needed to do was simply offset the “TAX CLEARANCE LEVY” mandated by the IRS in order to authorize deposit into my bank account. I mean, how lucky can a girl get? Continue reading

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Money Can’t Buy Me Love…But I’m OK With That

money picHave you ever received one of those emails from the son of a Prince or King of some far away province? Usually these poor guys are in some sort of trouble requiring them to flee their homeland at the risk of losing their fortune,  which, naturally, leads them to seek assistance in salvaging their wealth. This most often involves requesting permission to transfer gobs of money into a (your) personal bank account, with the promise of a handsome payout for the abettor (that is, the email recipient…you). I think we’re probably all familiar with these life-changing offers. And, hopefully, we all recognize them for the scams they are.

But, I have some exciting news that makes me think my ship has finally come in. And, no, I didn’t just fall off the…umm…the…I’m thinking it’s some sort of farm vehicle that I just did not fall from. A hay truck? Is that a thing? Anyway, I did not just fall off that thing. No, I know this is for real because my email did not originate from some off-shore royalty, but a real-live government agent. Yes, a United States government agent. I know this, because in the “Sent” column of my email, it clearly states AGENT JOHN EDWARD with the “Subject Line” stating GET BACK TO ME IMMEDIATELY. Yes, in caps. This guy means business and it appears rather urgent that I get back to him. Immediately. So, naturally, I do NOT want to keep him waiting. And, since the message is simply oozing authenticity and is, quite obviously, pressing, I’ve forgiven the frequent typos. I mean the WHITE HOUSE (yes, more caps), Homeland Security, and the  IRS are all involved in this covert operation. This is clearly important stuff.  I’ve included the email for your perusal. This just shows to go ya: sometimes good things DO happen to good people.

So, my dear BWB friends, this may be my swan song to blogging. Oh, I  may, for frolic, pull out my laptop for a post now and then. Maybe just to let you know in what tropical paradise I’m currently sunbathing. And please, don’t hate me for my good fortune. Just keep your eyes open in your Inbox. Your day will come… For now, I must to be on my way. Got a pretty important email to respond to. Note to self: do NOT forget the G11 code. It’s for my own good.

FROM AGENT JOHN EDWARD GET BACK TO ME IMMEDIATELY?.
I received an INTEL MEMO from the WHITE HOUSE in my office today and I must advice you as follows:
1: I received an Intel from our wiretap internet protocol office that my communication with you have been breached by impostors which have prompted immediate action from my side to make sure that this transaction is secured. Today, I issue you this code for communication (G11) which must be contained both in the subject and at the end of any of my email letter to you, This is for your own good.
2: With instruction from the White House and the United states Department of Homeland Security, I am informing you that you due consignment box containing your total payment fund of US$10,000,000.00 (Ten Million United States Dollars) is approved for release and delivery to you as soon as you fulfill all “OBLIGATION” and offset the refundable “TAX CLEARANCE LEVY” mandated by the IRS on all consignment that has been in our vault over 3 months.
Note that as i write you now, your funds contained in your consignment box is presently in our maximum storage vault in Atlanta, GA and will only be marked cleared for release once you fulfill all “OBLIGATION” stated on your release questionnaire by Homeland security.
Once I hear from you, I will instruct further.
Regards,
Agent John Edward

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